Backbiting, fed up and makrout

Selamat hari raya! Saha eid kom! Eid Mubarak! Bon Aïd!

Eid was great but coming back to office after a long holiday is not so great after all. It's not just me feeling that way but I guess the majority do. Work is so-so, I mean it's normal for an employee. Office politics, backbiting tire me down. Honestly I couldn't tolerate anymore. Now...im trying to push HoneyStar to complete his study as soon as possible with the hope to migrate somewhere else. Is Malaysia is least better place than others? Maybe..But I do believe that there are other better places to live or even new places to explore. I've been bitten by "adventure" bug so I'm all for this travel around the globe. The only thing I would probably miss about Malaysia is my family or perhaps the weather too. i am not much into chilly snowy winter.
My ma is not feeling well and will be schedule for surgery next month. Insyallah. I'm feeling bad since I couldn't accommodate her. She refused to stay with me since my apartment is always empty during the days and I might be travelling for some field works from now and then. I pray for some little kiddos to tag along soon so that ma will agree to stay with me and of course I'll have a new profession as a professional homemaker. I could picture us doing some morning walk after HoneyStar off for work and me pushing the pram. We could stop and have a rest on the bench if she feels tired and we could chit chat from everything to nothing…J Insyallah.

Sometimes I wonder, will I ever miss my current profession later when I finally resign or not? All that I know, I will never had the chance to experience it again. As waiting for the time to arrive, I try to commit myself to it, finding job satisfaction and at least I could always sigh to myself…been there, done that...again. Whatever it is I don't see myself permanently slaving for these people. What will I do if the time finally comes? I don't know...all that I could think of is not rushing to office every morning and perhaps I could cook makrout whenever I wanted because I do have the space to do so... plus extra time to doze..ZZZZZZZ

HoneyStar received a box of traditional cookies from a friend who just came from Algeria and I was more than happy to see a makrout in it and of course it was shared with HoneyStar. My eyes even caught a glimpse of makrout while Reading a walk in life's blog entry. i simply love the combination of the semolina & dates...All these apparitions making me realize that I have an overdue assignment to complete...yes, making the makrout for the first time…

Everyone smiles in the same language

I got up late as usual. 8. 30 Am. had my breakfast and I stuff my tummy with two cups of coffee with milk or shall I say milk with coffee and munched the cookies. Then I went around the house, checking what the ladies were cooking and chatted to them with what-ever-words. The weather was super nice, sunny and with some wind. There were cous cous and cous cous and cous cous everywhere. The sheep was all gone to into the pot. Some children were sitting nearby the ladies hoped to be given some cooked lamb. They were successful. yes, withh those small pitiful eyes... And me? I refused it and said that I would it later with guest. Yes, I started to feel nervous. The lamb did give a strong smell. After “chatting” to them I decided to make a tour around the house’s compound. Sunny day best enjoyed on the roof. I climbed the stairs with my camera on my hand. There were the girls + a boy joking with each other. The youngest, Amal started to say something which of course I dint understand J so I took their photo. Amal as usual the clown of the family and she always know how to pose funny faces for my lense.

After a few circle around the yard plus the ups and downs the stairs, trying to be busy, I had to admit that I was not busy at all. I just had nothing to do. They dint let me to do anything, well not exactly but i couldnt find things i could do. it was 11 am, my sis in law, halimah asked me to go inside and started to "get ready". I was really excited to wear the new jubbah, the present from Baba which I had difficulties in finding the right size. suddenly i felt like i was in Malaysia, digging the stores' stocks for suitable size. that day, I spent the whole afternoon in Rouiba and Regaya just to look for XXL jubbah that pleased me. I had the eyes for violet this time, so I got mine a violet jubbah with elaborated beads and a pair of shoes two sizes smaller.

After being given permission by HoneyStar, I asked my sis in law for make up as I dint bring mind since I was thinking that it’s such a hassle to take it along and I only going wear it for once. My o my, her make up collection is more than me. She helped me to apply light shade on my face. Finally I did the finishing touch since I was a little bit horrified with the thoughts of having my face painted with the thick Arab make up style. Alhamdulillah, I only put some eye shadow and neutral colour lipsticks. i ended up looking like me :)

By 12pm, the guest started to show up, they are mostly relatives. So here again, me receiving enormous hugs and kisses. I was more than happy to be introduced to my husband’s friend’s wife who could actually speak English. So there were us getting to know each other, sharing stories. And then, it’s time to eat the “lamb cous cous”...arggghh I couldn’t. Time to look for my prey. Yes! Yusuf, my nephew was nearby. I made a cue for him to approach me. He was a little bit hesitate since the children were not supposed to disturb the adult eating. Luckily his mother was nearby and I asked her permission to give my “lamb” to him. She took the “lamb” and put it on another plate and asked Yusuf to follow her to the back. I was so relief. I finished my cous cous and the vegetable served with the soup. I like cous cous and had lamb cous cous before but this time, I just couldn’t stand it.

Honestly, by 3pm...I started to feel hungry again. I was telling myself to hold on since we will have the coffee break soon. I LOVE the espresso with warm fresh milk…yummy and I could say that there will be lots of cookies. I saw many guest brought all types of cookies...there were makrot, liled, charade, of course baklava and others which I don’t even know the name. At 4, the coffee and cookies were ready and I had two cups of coffee with milk and 4 cookies. Gosh...i was starving!

The guest began to excuse themselves and the family left one by one. The chicken now could rest peaceful in the chicken coop since the boys were gone. Only my nephew who continued to run around the house, climbing the fig tree. The day end soon...the ladies were done with the cleaning. We sat together in the “saloon” and unwrapped the gifts; I was busy taking the photos of it. Too bad we couldn’t take all of it back. I decided to give them to the family. I only took the jubbah, headscarf and of course the cash

Before I went to sleep, I turned to HoneyStar and said “terima kasih abang, I am very happy”. He smiled and replied “Wa ana kazaliq”. A start of another multicultural family and language doesn’t seem a barrier. Everyone smiles in the same language. And the “lamb” is not much of problem after all.

I love the sheep, not the lambs.

The ladies in the kitchen were talking loudly. I could hear them roared laughter once awhile. I have no idea what they are talking about, maybe jut catching up with each other. Two khaltis are here to help with the cooking. HoneyStar said it’s going to be lamb cous cous for the lunch. Since yesterday the air smell lamb and I’m feeling a bit dizzy. HoneyStar slaughtered the sheep and Baba was helping. The ladies helped to clean the internal organ and I was standing there watching. Yes, only watching I dint help at all I dint know what to help and the thoughts of me petting the sheep’s head couple of hours before its’ death is a bit disturbing.

That night, everyone was enjoying their “internal affair’. The menu for dinner was the sheep’s liver, pancreas and I don’t know what other internal organs. I’m not a big fan of lamb at all. I do eat but don’t favour it. Internal organs were out of my mind. I struggled to chew chicken’s liver being served to me the first few days I was here. It’s not their fault but me who does not like animal’s internal organs. I did eat once awhile and that was it. I remembered when they insisted me to have the first serve, a gesture of respect I guessed. I just took half of the liver and chewed it bitterly. Janna, the 2 years old girl was sitting next to me, enjoying her meal. I secretly dropped the piece of chicken liver in her plate and she ate it without the adult realised what I had done. I continued my dinner with a relief.

suddenly the "Black Sheep" crawled into my mind. well, you'll understand it if you've been living in NZ before, yikes!"

Tonight, I was offering myself to do the dishes as usual but my SIL, Khadijah refused. She told me in the language. I don’t understand a single word but through her gesture I know she meant that. She took a bottle of juice from the fridge and a clean glass. I accepted it and sat down, drinking the cold sweet juice while watching the foreign “family sitcom” with no subtitle in front of me. After some time, I excused myself to prepare the bed for the night. I bumped into HoneyStar and Khadijah was telling him something. He said the sister asked me to take a rest and let others do the work. Great! I have nothing to do. I finished the three novels I brought with me, the satellite TV is in my BIL’s room and I couldn’t understand the local channel. So I decided to blog. HoneyStar promised to take me to the bookstore after weekend. I’m not too excited about it since the chance for me to find English book is rare. The books are either in Arabic or French.

“Could I wear make up tomorrow?” “Where will you get the make up?” “I don’t know maybe I’ll ask the ladies, some kohl is good enough”. I wish to wear make up on my wedding, at least this time since I was bare-faced for my real wedding last year. It was a mixed gathering so I had no chance. This time, it will be a separate gathering so I was hoping to paint my face with some neutral colours. I though he would disagree since last night I was told that his tradition permit the family members of the deceased to wear henna. I was unsatisfied with his reason but I had to settle with the main reason which is to just follow what his father said, to take care of his fragile heart at the moment. So I was thinking that if I’m not allowed to paint my hands with henna which is pure how could I paint myself with the cosmetic? Then he uttered, “Just a bit, ask my sister for the “tools”. I immediately called Najma and asked him to ask her. I was surprised when she took out a bag of make up from the drawer. It’s almost complete set just without mascara. He asked again,” who will do it for you?” “Me, I’ll do it myself”.

So here I am blogging the story of the day before I set off to bed.

31 hours in a day

" Alger la Blanche, là je suis..

we arrived at 11 am local time. The long queue at the immigration was terrible. Some men started to yell at each other. “Welcome to Algeria”...Honeystar whispered to me, “You have seen nothing yet”. Things were worse for some foreigners who speak neither Arabic nor French…and I was one of them. HoneyStar kept reminding me not speak English at least not loudly. So I was in “mute”. Long after the immigration, here came the luggage…no, not yet. We waited for one hour and glad to see our two luggage on the sight.

We went out the terminal and there was my FIL, BIL and two SILs. We were greeted the “hugs and kisses” way. I could predict that it’s going to be lots of hugs and kisses while im here.

We are taken straight to the makbara visiting my MIL’s grave. Again, HoneyStar dint let any tears to run down his cheek. I had a mixed feeling. I was sad but I guess the fact that I dint have the chance to really know her made me less emotional. I remembered few phone calls and she would always want to say something to me. A simple greeting that’s all we had. I always planed to thank her for giving birth to the wonderful man that I’m married when I meet her but I had no chance. Prayers for her, May Allah granted her Jannah.

HoneyStar said...we don’t come back to mourn but to comfort the family. That’s the way a death should be.

A short time in makbara brought us back “home”. The family and relatives were waiting for us. I was introduced to them, one by one, from the eldest to the youngest. Hugs and kisses gain and again. I recited the same sentences again and again “wusraki? Alhamdulillah, Labbas”. The phrase is the only words I know in the dialect. Well, up to that moment and I was quite sure that I’ll learn more during the stay.

The journey was tiring, they constantly asked me to have a rest, to lie down but I just couldn’t. I just sat there among the elder ladies and smiled. Yes I smiled a lot. With 7 hours difference, I had more than 24 hours in a day. We had 31 hours a day. I remembered that I used to say what it will be like if we had more than 30 hours a day. In a way, I had it.

Finally I gave up and was dozing off by 7.00 pm. My SIL, Fatimah covered me with a nice soft fluffy blanket, 17 Celsius felt less cold with the warmth and loves in the house. I just could feel it. I woke up after one hour and had a dinner which I felt like having sahoor. It was past midnight back in Malaysia.

I continued to sit with the old ladies, “listening” to theirs stories.

Without my knowledge, my sister in laws prepared my bed and I retired to be as early as ten. Yes, another wish has been granted…a wish to have more than 30 hours in a day J

The Longest Journey

Today marked 10^th day me in the country. I always wanted every single thing that happen while I’m here but I dint seem to be able to write it. Perhaps because there are too many details that I need to write and I end up not writing anything. I guess it’s normal, when you failed to write things that you wanted to write you end up not writing at all.

I got to write even though just few sentences, only then, I will get grip of my “words and finally the nonsense will revisit again.

Shall I start with the journey?

MIL passed away 11 hours before we departed from the international airport. .. at 8.00 am local time. I was still in the office packing things and getting ready for the long holiday. a friend called me to say Bon voyage to me and we had a chat. she conveyed her condolences to me..and i dint even know about it yet. she said that her husband just received the news. yes, our husbands are good friends and i was sure that news travel fast. Honey Star texted me an hour after that. I couldn’t imagine how sad he was at that time. i was shocked too. i didnt know what to say when i met him later.. i was wrong he looked calmer than i expect. I honestly adore his patience and courage. I dint see any single tears in his eyes. It's a great lost to us. i woulnt know how i would react if i was in his shoes. may Allah reward him for his sabr. may Allah grant Yammah with jannh. HoneyStar calmness convinced me that sadness shouldn’t be about tears only.

“When a person dies, his actions come to an end, except in one of three ways: A continuing act of charity, (or sadaqah), or a useful contribution to knowledge, or a righteous child who prays for him.” (Muslim, Abu Dawood, Al-Bukhari in “Al-Adab Al-Mufrad)...insyallah HoneyStar is the "child"

He went to fetch me from the office as usual and we went back to get ready for the long journey. My brother came and we had tea together. Honey Star even cracked some jokes. His mobile kept on ringing. Friends calling to convey condolences. i continued clearing the kitchen, making sure we dint forget to take out the rubbish.

We left our house at 8.00pm, stopping by to reload the petrol before picking his friend who’s going to be responsible taking care of the car and our apartment. We arrived at the airport, did check in and prayed isyak. His friend, Mustafa and wife were there too. So the men went to have drinks and me and the wife headed for some sandwiches. I was a bit hungry since the evening tea was just some leftovers I cooked on weekend.

It’s 11pm and time to go through the immigration. We took our time, walking slowly and waited by the depature gate. I was telling myself “it’s going to be a long journey”. 12 am our flight departed for Istanbul. 10 hours 30 minutes. 30 minutes more than my journey down under ages ago. so this is my longest journey by plane. First, I was planning to just sleep through out the hours. I was wrong. I could only sleep for 5 hours. Of course it’s uncomfortable squeezing ourselves in economy class but Alhamdulillah we could afford it and the most important is to be with the family.

The entertainment system offer a variety but I ended up spending my time flipping the channel with no interst of finishing even a movie. I tried to read my novel, unfortunately was too tired to read. I forced myself to drink lots of water which made me going to the loo for many time. At least I could stretch my legs.

Finally, after the longggg daunting hours, we arried in Attartuk airport. The temperature was 11 celcius. Great. I had my cotton dress only. It such a relief that we spent 4 hours in the terminal only. The terminal was crowded, perhaps because it’s not as big as KLIA and many flights land here. Lots of tourists all different nationalities.

We rushed to get our connecting flight boarding pass and had our fajr prayer. Then we just lingered around the terminal. HoneyStar decided to change some euro to Lira. He went to buy some food so We had some pastry and mineral water. Surprised to know that after converting to RM. We spent almost RM40 for two bottles of mineral water and a piece of local pastry which had a weird taste.

I was searching for the camera and got panic when I couldn’t find it. I started to grumble. Yeah, what’s the point of having holiday without taking photos for memory. Honeystart calmed me and helped me searching for it in our notebook’s bag. Alhamdulillah, it’s there. I was grumbling for nothing, poor Honeystar had to deal with it. Sorry, silly silly me

The next stop was the duty-free shop. Wow, they have lots of Turkish delight! I never imagine myself eating a “real” Turkish delight in TURKEY…I repeat, in TURKEY. They had tester for every single type. So I had my time testing it..well not too much since we bought one box only for the family. Kindda hesitate to eat more. Insyallah we’ll buy more on the way back to Malaysia since we are stopping by for 3 days in Instanbul.

Finally, the flight to Algiers departed from Atarturk aiport. It was another 4 hours journey. The Turkish Airline was quite empty, so we the row of 4 seats to ourselves. The lunch served was good, no more spicy food. Again, I couldn’t made up my mind in choosing what to watch and end up watching bits and pieces. I had a short nap but was a bit restless. The time difference and I sighed..jet lag had begun.

Ooo what a long wayyyy i had.

Waayyy Too FickLe FriDay

It’s Friday...we have longer lunch hour. I dint know where to go and what to do. I went to the next block and did some window shopping and grabbed a fridge cover that I’ve been looking for.

Tomorrow is Saturday. Couldn’t think of anything interesting to do except some serious cleaning and scrubbing around the house. Just the same routine which I haven’t really follow lately. Of course I wanted to go out and do some sight seeing but with this kind of weather I prefer to stay indoor than burning myself under the Waayy too hot sun. My idea of relaxing is to sleep the whole day and only wake up for meals. Aahh...impossible, unless I’m dead I have tons to do and I hate doing the chores on weekdays. next week i will be doing the "hokey pekey" dance again. yes, im not going to office! going for pilot study around the district only..so i'll be back around to nag my HoneyStar :P

Life is okay...there’s sunshine but sometimes the clouds just appear out from nowhere...and gosh I hate that days. Work is so-so. The office politics really make me Waaayy too sick...then on tuesday I was really sick . Had light fever and bitten by anonymous flu bug which I end up drugged almost every night. so it's a "blue" week for me. I managed to decline n asignment out of the town this time after giving much thoughts about it. hey i got my work schedule. i did go for my asignment to Sarawak last time. so now, it's someone else's turn. she agreed to take it since last 2 weeks..suddenly she changes her mind just because her best friend was not going. how selfish could it be! yes..the best friend IS my Boss and even worse I AM new. who cares? i just going to put a straight face and say NO. couldnt be bother with the flight ticket provided..send me a private jet and i go :)Yes, I was...i mean I am pretty much pissed off with my seniors. Better keep my tongue tied and just do my work. Now since I’m illigible to apply for a post in the colleges, I’ll do that a.s.a.p. nice to be able to hop to a new environment. Of course the adapting process will be challenging. My current job is amazing, others are fighting to get this position but I guess it’s not my cup of tea at all...well..just a bit. i couldnt lie about my interest. but with these waaayyy too fickel minded people who dont practise what they preech, i started to think of other options.

Doing research is good but teaching is Waayy too great. However I couldn’t imagine myself going back to schools. Not until the whole system be “washed”. What could be worse than going to “useless” courses on weekends...okay, enough of my blabbering. From now I just take life as it is. Just imagine me giving a “sidekick” to thosewho are making my life miserable.

Next story, my weight gain is wayyyyyy unhealthy. I gained 10 kg in 6 months. I wonder where the mistake is. Okay let me list down…I was eating anything I ever want, too much of sweet stuff, lack of exercise, long hours of hibernation, double meals. Wait, I have better explanation, I could not resist from my own cook. I was cooking way to GOOD...hahaha (giving my head a knock…yeah right!) the constant travel and staying in hotels making me stuffing myself with…whatever.

homecooked meal is wonderful but eating excessive bread is plumping me. i love bread so much, more than rice or pasta. the best part is, i am destined to marry a bread-eater. too much carbs. i'm like a bun with extra dose of yeast.

So last 2 weeks...i decided, enough is enough. I have reached the heaviest moment in my life and my cholesterol level is not looking good. Still below the "dangerous" line but I rather take early precaution. So here am i...eating lightly. I avoid the oily food and sweet snacks. The calorie count is actually helping. I’m trying to consume 1200 calorie per day and 30 minutes of exercise. I better make full use of my bigest investment so far by buying the cross trainer. I’m happy with the result. Slow but there’s always progress. better make it permenent.

I tried the cabbage soup but couldn’t hold on to it. Wayyyy too little food and made me tired and I have flu since Monday. i'm sick of the cabbage soup and guess what, my favourite day is the "banana" day...other days I felt like my brain stops thinking will eat healthily and keep on watching my calorie. NO MEAL after 5. Fruits are okay. Hey, I’m not going to starve myself...i wont, never will. I just want to be healthy.

Next, I’m counting my days to take a month break! Yes, no kidding! i am Waayyy too excited. I’ll be traveling across the continent and it’s good to know that I don’t have to be annoyed with those people-who-can-never-shut up.News travels really fast. I just submitted a permission letter to travel oversea and by the next day...everybody was talking about it. Some even thought that I already gone (I was on sick leave for a day). since when they care! I say...perhaps 15 hours flight wont be bad after all.

Another 40 minutes before lunch time ends. So better stop now and browse through some recipes to cook. Yes, I’m SUCK in cooking and HoneyStar has to eat it anyway. Poor Love :P

I've Been Bitten By a "Cleaning Bug'

it's not an easy thing for me to balance between work and keeping a house squicky clean all the time. i will try my best to make everything in order. the best tip is to always keep it clean after every use so i dont have to scrub it hard every time i have spring cleaning. perhaps i dont even need any spring cleaning.last sunday was kitchen cleaning. next week i'll aim for the fridge and hall ,another week will be the bedroom, then,the middle room, then,guess room, then balcony. insyallah after a month i rotate the kitchen again.

saturday should be a day out..visiting friends, shopping or just a lunch out with Honey Startime is limited, life is hard, an organised schedule hope to make it better. i should be a better organiser since i'll be traveling frequently from now and then.

So yesterday HoneyStar was teaching me some lesson in cleaning. Yes, it’s good to be married to a “cleaning bug”. You’ll be affected too, otherwise you’ll be bitten by it :P

Kitchen Cleaning To-Do List

Every Day Kitchen Duties:

• Wipe down the sink after doing the dishes or loading the dishwasher (30 seconds).

• Wipe down the stove top (one minute).

• Wipe down the counters (one minute).

• Sweep, Swiffer, or vacuum the floor (two minutes).

Every Week :

• Mop the floor (five minutes).

• Wipe the cabinets, backsplashes, and appliances (10 minutes).

• Wash the dish rack (four minutes).

• Wipe the switch plates and phone (one minute).

• Wipe the inside of the garbage can (one minute).

Every Season:

• Empty and scrub down the inside of the refrigerator (30 minutes).

• Empty and clean the insides of the utensil drawers (15 minutes).

• Scrub down the cupboard exteriors (30 minutes).

• Clean the stove-hood filter (10 minutes).

• Perform "Shiny Sink 101".

Beat the Clock

In the time it takes to brew a pot of coffee, you can get through your "every day" list.

Be Prepared

Keep extra garbage bags (or a whole roll) at the bottom of your trash can and never again have to retrieve an apple core from a bagless bin.

Let It Shine
1. Fill sink to the rim with very hot water; add one cup regular bleach. Soak for one hour.

2. Drain and rinse thoroughly.

3. Scrub with Ajax, Bon Ami, or baking soda.

4. Be sure to rinse thoroughly.

5. Shine with Windex or another glass-cleaning spray.

6.Dry Thoroughly.

Things We Need

• Burner grids and knobs • Brushes and combs • Toothbrushes • Plastic utensil organizer • Refrigerator drawers • Drain catch • Sponges • Dish rack • Plastic toys (use discretion)

Cleaning Supplies to Keep in the Kitchen

• Clorox Disinfecting Wipes :for all hard, nonwood surfaces. They leave a fresh, nonchemical scent. X have

• Windex Glass and Surface Wipes :for windows and chrome. x have

•Microfiber cloths and mops, such as StarFiber or Act Natural ; euronetusa.com: green alternatives to disposable wipes, or to chemical cleaners and paper towels. For cleaning all surfaces. Especially effective for polishing stainless steel. i have microfiber cloths and mops and i love it. the mop is amazing in getting rid of hair since i have serious hairfall problem.

• Bleach. Yes..always

• Ajax ,Bon Ami or baking soda. I do have other type of floor cleanser and baking soda for baking purposes. i guess it's really handy to have it all the time

• Clorox ReadyMop : Wash the floor without a bucket. Works on most surfaces. No..but i do have a local brand :) still work wonders

• Broom, Swiffer , or handheld vacuum: for crumb busting. No vacuum.. no carpet in the house so i guess broom and swiffer is enough

Thanks FoR The MeMoRy

today is my last day in the sector..my last sweet day and may next days ahead be sweeter. hahaha..as if im moving far away..just one level up and few plight of steps.

HoNeY StaR bought a cake written THANK YOU for me to bring to office and some cash to pay the breakfast i ordered earlier. he said i should thank my previous colleagues especially my boss for giving this opportunity to show my talent in research and evaluation :) i need to settle that pending wedding party in the office anyway. better get it down before i actually move myself...try not to get involved with them much.

Why im being transferred? they said it is a reshuffle but my evil mind said..there's a foul play going on. the best they can do is putting me in a new "promising" sector. well, that's what everyone said. me? it's the same. they pay me and i work..i work even they dint pay me :) -some tough experience i finally overcame.

when my superior handed me the letter..i almost popped my eyes. whose decision is this?
? it's the director..bla bla bla. guess..my transfer started the day after. so..i took my time to calm down. dint pack anything. i just spread the news to my close coll. i was okay about it till i told my "friend". she dint seem to be surprised like most of us..so confirmed some of them know the "game" even before i knew it. what the...

i went back and told my Honey StaR about it. i tried not to have such suspicious feeling. then...the DaY..it was announced in the assembly..so people keep on asking me..how do i get to choose the "hot" sector. i dint. it just happened :) "another surprise wedding gift" i joked around. just to hide the bad thoughts i had.

half of the day was filled with laughter and lots of food for the division eid celebration. i reported to my new boss which doesnt seemed to have a clue where and when the "reshuffle" was coming. a typical welcoming speech "We're happy to have you around". mm..they are not stranger, i involved with their research from now and then..most of them know me well.

after the long Friday lunch break..the truth started to reveal. pretty much what i thought before. yes..i am transferred to give way for someone to stay. i laughed.."if you couldnt change it..laugh at it". knowing my inability to talk things through with my big boss..i'm accepting it. hey everyone wanted to be in that "cool" sector..i was one of them but never had the guts to do so. when it was time for me to go..i just pack some of my junks and threw away most of others. now, 99% are at the new office. my new bos is not around so i'm taking a time out and chose to stay at my old office..kindda fun to see some people are reckless seeing me around.

shall i say "Sweet Revenge?"..not so for some bubble head. i gave her rm2k project last time perhaps that's not enough and she kicked me...so i'm the typical super-nice-but-betrayed character. so how does it feel being back stabbed...Ouch..hurt

being in the new sector hope to speed up my phd plan..after postponing it for almost 2 years. i choose to quit and start afresh soon. writing research will be my core business so there's a high chance for me to master those research methodology in a year or so. bye bye working days. go back to the grad school. stay for 3 years and move to Sahara Desert..no kidding! Africa! Here I Come!

i couldnt deny that i did learn something in the previous unit..i just didnt fit in..Allah has better plan for me. he's removing me from the gossipers and backstabbers..avoiding me from being one of them. before i move my last piece of junks upstairs...to all those in the XXX Sector.

THANKS FOR THE MEMORY..I AM WELL-FED

am looking forward to reduce my weight gained in the sector:)

i shouldnt burden my thoughts with this matter..after all these awfull days, i'm looking foward to see my HoNeY StaR. yes..just love to see his smile after tiring days..

This is MY country

i was reading a blog on inter-racial marriage and feeling like writing a comment. then i ended up filling a long one which suit more as an entry. hey, that's her blog..i shouldnt mess hers with my junks :P sorry princess. so i decided to write it in my own blog.

shall i begin with...

I am a product of an inter-racial marriage and living in Malaysia. My father is a local and mother is a Pakistani descendant. I have my mother’s facial features while my father’s height. People mistakenly identify me as a foreigner from the middle east. Yes, I do get the stares when walking with the locals.

When I was a child, some naughty children used to shout at me “Go back to your country!” but...
this is my country. I don’t speak Urdu and know a little about the Pakistani culture. I regard myself as a Malaysian, never lived abroad except for my undergraduate years in New Zealand and some brief holiday here and there. Honestly I felt more accepted in the countries more than my homeland. it's fair enough if i was treated as a foreigner in the foreigner countries.

Now, I am married to a wonderful foreigner who I met in a local graduate school. He’s been staying in the country for 6 years and that’s make things a bit easy for us. He is fully aware of my culture and could even speak the language. Me? I neither speak Arabic nor French let alone his mother-tongue. We used English a lot. We do have miscommunication many many times and it did piss me off but not for long . The best solution is to always discuss about it a.s.a.p..and of course we had good laugh after that: O and to update, I don’t get the awkward stare when walking in public with him. We looked so “blend in”...

I’m ready to learn Arabic and French. Hopefully I will master the language in less than 5 years...Insyallah by that time i'll be more ready to hop from country to country. yesterday i came out with "funny" idea. i suggest we label all those spices in the kitchen with 4 languages Bahasa Malaysia, English, Arabic and French. i'm looking forward to stick the colourful stickers on the cute lil bottles.

my tale is just one side story of inter-racial "product" and i'm sure there are others who share similar experiences. a marriage includes falling in love many times..again and again..to the same person (this quote is not originally mine..got it somewhere on the web).

It’s amazing how Allah creates human with unique differences. Masyallah. It makes the world such an interesting place to live :) culture and language shouldn’t be the barrier. For me, having the same faith and sharing the same values are important. Just that we need to tolerate more. The choice is ours with Allah’s will of course.

I Have Moved To Sahara Desert

me and My Honey Star having a rest while our camel was securely parked in front of our home :)

my brain is goin empty..first i couldnt decide what to write for the title of my entry..i am moving..i move..finally i have moved. wow..my grammar knowledge is getting bad. so much of information and writing report done in Bahasa. i think my Bahasa improved less than 1% yet my English is getting worst. just a year in this office..am totally clueless..hey how am i supposed to start my phd..i mean, couldnt do a Bahasa based research and English is just right 'subject" and making me having more "opportunity" to join the Saharan's clan.

wait...i need to learn Arabic, French...am so totally excited to be multilingual. can you imagine..me being able to read more books and the best thing is i could understand Al-Quran...how cool can it be? much more cool than climbing mount Everest.

gotta go..glad to know that i do have this touch of "nonsensically" writing skill..even after being hitched by a Green Alien :P

SchooL No 2

there i was at the lobby waiting for my lift and like i guessed they were late. gosh! i hate it when they said "Malaysian time" hello! what do you mean by "Malaysian time"? i thought we are from the same time zone. grow up..stop using such excuse for being late.

finally the state department SUV parked at the front entrance. there were driver 2 and officer 2. the officer got down from the SUV and carried my "box". then, we went to the school no 1 which slightly out of the town, a rural school. we had to pass the small crowded road till we arrived in a quieter small road. i could see the vegetable farms along the small road. a scenery that i definitely missing in my recent life.

my mobile rang and it was the school coordinator in school no 2. i had no choice but to apologise for being late, yes i promised him to be there by 8..now..it's 845...it was almost 9 when we reached the school. officer no 2 asked the driver to carry the "box" up to the office. what? there he was talking non stop. bla bla bla

the senior assistant turned to be his old colleague. so there they were "catching up" i was almost shouting "HEY..i have job here!" but of course i dint..i handed the school questionnaire to the senior assistant since the principal was not around. he was about to pass the booklet to another teacher..then, i had to say that he had to answer it...mmm..honestly, im not sure he really complete it by himself or not.

back to my story, i was leaving the office and about to carry my "box" when officer 2 told me..let the school assistant carry that. i was surprised...hey the box was not heavy at all. cant you just carry that and i could start my work. what a waste of time..so two school asistant came to carry that one box. hahaha.

lucky enough to see the students all ready with their stationary but i had to instruct them to go and get their calculator from the class. the school coordinator was really helpful. helping distributing the booklets which took some time since each students were assigned different booklet.

the test started...and suddenly officer no 2 appeared out of nowhere, inviting me for breakfast. i declined the invitation since i had my dinner at 7.15 "my time". he was persuasive..i told him i need to invigilate the test. "dont be so tight..just leave it to the coordinator" i almost argued with him..then the school coordinator approached me and said, "just go madam..it's an honoured". so i said okay.

i was restless in the canteen. i sipped the tea and excused myself. hurgh.what a relief. it's not about being afraid to bent the rule..but it's my responsibility. i'm paid monthly..and this is part of my job. before i left the canteen, officer 2 constantly asking me if i wanted to eat durian or not. i told him no thanks..i'm not a great fan of the torny fruit after all. he insisted.."whatever..just tell me that you are the one who wanted to eat the fruit" i left him and back to the test room. i told the school coordinator to leave me with the students.

officer no 2 was out of the side..so i could just do my work without people ridicule me for being too "discipline"..what a dork!
after the last session..when i was giving some students extra time to complete their questionnaires..officer 2 appeared out of no where..again with his durian agenda. i told him i had to stay and wait for the students to finally done...

then..lunch time, 3 other teachers joined us plus the driver. so there were the durians..i had some and of course officer 2 had more. he was dozing all the way back..

huh..what a scum! i'm glad to know that he wont be accompanying me tomorrow. honestly, i dont need any "escort"..just a lift forth and back to the schools..i'm fine with that..

to the students..well done! some of them tried their best to complete the questionnaires :)
although i think..it was not right for the senior assistant to tell them that...those good ones will be sent to australia for next PISA project..i hate it when adults are making fun of the innocent kids.

hope tomorrow be better..

SchooL No 1

today is my second day in Alor Setar. i went to 2 schools to administer the test. the students were great, teachers too. i'm feeling like an important person when the driver picked me every morning from the hotel and an officer would surely accompanied me each day. well, thanks.

yesterday was what i called a "professional" treatment and i was pretty much grateful for that. the officer who accompanied me approached me at the lobby and carried my "test" box. it was not that heavy but hey..i had to push a heavy load trolley down the basement back in my division with no help.so, i was glad to have someone to do that for me. hehehe. the principal welcome me and left me with the senior assistant. she helped me to distribute the booklet to the students and i excused her to leave me invigilating the test. nothing much to be done..i just sat there and walked around once awhile. the state officer left for another school to do his task. i was more than happy to be left alone.

i had no problem with the students except that some of the items in the questionnaire which confused some of them. 12.30 pm, i was all ready, packed my "box" and there, the state officer came to "pick" me. LOL..the driver was not in sight..i went to the office to collect the questionnaire from the principal, unfortunately...she's not in the office.

"madam...please join me for lunch in the school canteen"
yikes! me? madam? hahaha..my boss used to yell my name BULANnnnnn..whenever she dint see me lingering around..
i was having lunch while the driver arrived and joined us.
"where is the questionnaire?" the principal had not completed the questionnaire. great! 4 hours and i had to wait more.
so there was me with the principal, Senior assistant..talking about schools, students, teachers and education system..wow, i am a "pro" after all :)
"when is this lady going to stop talking?
she went on and on..complaining about teachers. huh! once i interrupted her by saying," maybe, you are giving so much pressure to your teachers..perhaps lessen their workload will improve their performance".
of course she was defending herself.
well, i couldnt say more because i never been a part of the school community after all. i had to agree to some of her points.
it's sad to know some teachers have no interest in teaching at all. to be a teacher, ones need to have the "soul". teacher is a friend, mother, father, sister. dont call yourself a teacher if you never worried about a student's life. i think a teacher will never blame a student for failing, he/she should reflect on the teaching..trying to figure out if the student is having other problem...before labeling them plain lazy

to the teachers, students of SchooL No 1..thank you
and of course mr driver 1 and mr state officer 1

Wake UP SLeePy HeaD!!!

i hate it when feeling sleepy and all those dodgy..huhuh..today is friday and im totally excited thinking..yeah tomorrow i gotta..mmm..what i'll be doing?
ok..let me list down, just to kill this sleepiness.

1. i NEED to dust the fan..freaking DusTy-DONE
2. mop the floor-DONE
3. dust the shelves-DONE
4. clean the fridge..trash away all those expired stuff :P-DONE..well, Harumi did it
   
5. let the rabbits out-DONE, but at the laundrette only
   
6. wash my clothes-DONE
7. iron working clothes for next week
8. call Taheerah and have a SPA-ing date?-she's out of the town for the weekend
   
9. fold the dried clothes-DONE
10. organise my bookshelf-A BIT
    
11. cook lemon chicken..hahahahah just came into my mind-DONT FEEL LIKE EATING IT
    
12. go to Nadia's in Cheras and pick up the cookies
13. change my bedsheet-DONE
14. wash the curtain-DONE
15. light the aromatherapy candle
16. on the salt mineral lamp
17. plant new plants
18. take the rabbits for walk
19. wash the rabbits' feet
20. clean the rabbits
21. read my book
22. do some revision..tajweed alert!!!
23. call up Leena for drinks?
    

A Garden, Chicken and Sheep

Before i start to blog on the topic related to ..a garden, chicken and sheep, i wanted to stress that this blog post is NOT about the Farmville Obsession in Facebook. I'm not a big fan of Facebook and NEVER get involved with Farmville. I have nothing against the craze..being a private person, i found that facebook-ing is so un-private..but i do browse friend's page. hahaha..i guess i am the facebook stalker after all.. LOL :P bad2 girl !

okay..back to my Garden, Chicken and Sheep..it goes like this..

When you are feeling all blue and crappy...you must think of things that make you happy or perhaps people that make you happy. At this very own time. All I could think is the flowers that blooming. Yes I planted new plants in the office. So that’s keeping me all excited to come to office. Not that super excited but enough to keep me going. Friends said that im just not born a gardener at all. The plants that I tried to plant seem to die in less than 5 months.

I never gave up. I ‘m not opening a plant nursery so nothing to worry about. I like to see the flowers blooming from the tiny seeds. It’s amazing how it grows. It’s like a magic when those plants come out from the soil. It doesn’t take that long for it to grow. In some cases…it only took a day. Planting a plant is somehow has its ups and downs. Call it lucky or whatever you please. The plants might just stop growing and seeing a plant dies is not a good experience. I always sad to see it dying and most of the time, I would try to save it. I agreed that it takes some knowledge to determine the right soil, lighting, water or even the right plants to grow. Where and when...

I’m a good example of a pure amateur gardener. Some people advised me to just quick planting flowers. They said I have “warm hands”which resulted to the plants dying. Whatever. I like keeping the world green plus some colour here and there. Unlike some people who couldn’t be other about planting trees yet have the guts to complain about global warming.

I have no blinking idea what plant this one should be...just wait and see

Acalypha hispida or better known as "cat's tail" plant in my country

Unfortunate enough for me to realize that sometimes my plants failed to survive no matter how careful I was…sometimes it does grow and you could see me smiling and grinning of satisfaction. It’s a huge accomplishment to me. Im better with the greens. Just those flowers need lots of sunlight and living in a small flat is a disadvantage.

The only sunny place is the launderette, even though it’s just for few hours in the morning. That’s okay for the greens but not sunny enough for the flowers. I used to have pink flowers at the small “balcony” but I don’t know why it’s stop producing more flowers. Huh….im not happy with that. Flowers always make me happy and im trying again and again.

Owwh... I do wish to live in a house with a small garden where I could spend time just planting and admiring the plants. Being a homely person. A garden definitely one of my biggest wishes. Last week, I had a dream. I was in a location which I think a farm but not a big one. Maybe a house at countryside with extra space for me to keep some farm animals. I was feeding the chickens. I could see a sheep...a white fluffy sheep. I was happy but I wonder why I don’t have cat with me. I love cats but yet I don’t have one. Mmmm…I do have rabbits now but that’s all I could squeeze in the tiny flat.

Better than nothing…

Could my dream of Garden and farm be classified as“escapism” from this unfavorable job?

i think adding some geese in my "little farm" will be a good idea

a Day at the Museum

me and Hirumi were at the museum..yes..i dragged her to the National Museum for Coffin Exhibition..she was all excited although a bit scared. i was all awake since morning but took ages to wrap my scarf. we went for heavy breakfast...i gotta stuff my chubby cheeks and empty tummy :) good to feel all full and focus on our educational trip. the coffin exhibition was okay...i expected it to be more than okay. cool anyway to see skeleton in a clay pot. anyway..i was 6 years old the last time i was there..so been loooooooooong time since i kept my brain updated with the historical background of my beloved country. it's all rusted...

the national Museum..always love the mural
Old bike..we had that back in my hometown

The Samurai's Occupation
Croco Money..hahaha..no wonder the rich people needed to be fat and strong..to carry the "heavy load"
Thai Coffin with such exotic details
Let me Sit in Peace
Indonesian taking a Buffalo ride..Beware! dont open it

14 carat death
I am sailing to the heaven
PeeKaaBoo!!!

Indulging ourselves with ice-cream sandwiches

lemongrass Crab, duck eggs in spicy coconut gravy and some greeny :)

this pic worth 365 days since i havent cooked crab for a year or so..so better keep the pics.

SunDaY FuN-DaY